WHEREAS retired people by definition have renounced their usefulness to the economy and civilization at large
WHEREAS retired people pose a threat to the safety of the American People by imposing themselves on our roads and highways
WHEREAS retired people make a nuisance of themselves in supermarkets and walmarts by writing checks and being generally slow and senile
WHEREAS retired people are oftentimes a little foggy in the head and ought to be considered the same threat to national security as unschooled children, and dealt with by equally extreme means (that is, forcibly)
WHEREAS retired people get social security checks that i pay for, while being rotten and claiming that they have paid into the system for a real long time and deserve them, while ignoring the fact that they had plenty of opportunities to get rid of the system before they paid into it their whole lives, counting on weasels like us not to shaft them from the big payoff at the end
WHEREAS retired people think they can end any argument by reminding us of how they lived through the Great Depression, and unless you did that you dont have a right to complain about anything, and that makes us really mad
WHEREAS retired people routinely throw away good american dollars to any overseas con artist who asks
WHEREAS retired people routinely throw away good american dollars to any domestic con artist who asks
WHEREAS retired people incessantly complain about 10-digit dialing and never hesitate to remind you of how grand things were with 4-digit dialing
WHEREAS we have been raised so that we feel guilty for not holding open the door for retired people and holding open the door for an old fart is totally ungratifying, since they probably shuffle very slowly, even though they are invariably warmly appreciative of this gesture, so we either waste our time in an ungratifying manner, or feel guilty for not doing it, and we hate that
WHEREAS Social Security, Medicare, and other retirement crap constitutes something like 38% of federal spending and it since it appears no one is able to reduce this rate, the only practical option to reign in these costs is to reduce the figure this rate applies to,
WHEREAS WHEREAS WHEREAS WHEREAS WHEREAS [[[to be completed at a later date[[[
